Monday, January 22, 2007

What a morning

The morning started out well, Noah actually slept from like 10pm till 630 am. Poor baby was so exhausted from the day before. He went back to bed at 8am and slept till 1030 at that point I got up fed him and gave him a bath. That is when it all went down hill. Paul decided to raise his voice at me, Maria jammed a piece of paper in the printer to a point that it is unreachable, and I can not seem to keep it together. What in the world is wrong with me!!

Noah is the joy of my life, but I just am not dealing with the big change well. The lack of sleep, trying to master breastfeeding, and schooling seems to be overwhelming me. It is hard because I feel so alone sometimes. I know I have Melissa here but there are parts me that I can not share with her because she just does not understand. I know my purpose is to serve my sister but there are times when I feel like I am being taken advantage of. I do not think she realizes all that I do. She tries to show her appreciation by buying me things. But that is not really what I want. I want her to appreciate it from her heart.

Being so far from my church is not helping either. The emptiness seems to be filling me from all around. Lord help me seek your face in this time when rest seems be minimal, when I feel taken advantage of help me to understand your purpose and Be with me Lord and give me peace.

1 comment:

  1. Angie,

    I'm sorry you are having a hard time right now; please be patient, it is going to go fast and before you know it little Noah will be eating off the plate and you will be cracking the whip real good (concerning homeschooling) in essence; Momma will be back!

    I remember all the chaos after Joshua's birth. It takes 3 months to a year to bounce back. And I mean the household routine. Read: 2 Corinthians 1:3-4. Paul is speaking. This chapter brought great comfort to me. Read vs-8-9 and you will see why it brought me comfort. You don't have to be that faraway to have great presssure, but our comforter will see us through it.

    Ponder on his word; get to a quiet spot while you feed Noah and just read the word. Let God fill you and comfort you.

    I love you, you are not alone.
    And the phase you and your family are going through is perfectly normal.

    God Bless you!


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