Tuesday, October 30, 2007

The season has ended...a New has begun

Well it is a official I have a liscensed driver in my home other than myself and Sam. Paul passed his driver's test yesterday. And he drove his father's truck to work yesterday. It was strange to watch my baby drive away alone. The vain thoughts and fears that come only from our own imagination swam through my mind. I had to bow my head and release him into the arms of Jesus! The only one who is our true protection!
On another note- Sammy and Joey finished up their soccer season with a bang. They made it all the way to the championship game. And lost by one point. It was the hardest thing as a mom to watch,a game full of physical contact, heart and desire by both sides. The advantage the other team was size- and that size paid off by one point. When the whistle blew to end the game- my heart broke for each one of those players who gave all they could give to win that championship for themselves, for their coach, and for their city! I had never been proudier of my sons. Sammy gave all of himself and more. It was the most incredible soccer game I had ever been too. Each team wanted to win!! My Sammy walked away with such a broken heart! But he is up today and ready to do it again- What a blessing he is to me- I would have been depressed for days!

My boy in action 

Friday, October 26, 2007

I sometimes just can not do it

I woke up this morning, wondering if this is it.......
 Is this what life is all about?
 Is this the way the Lord wants me to live?
 I love HIM so much. I try so hard to show my love, but I am not as good as others want me to be. I do not want to wear a dress-all the time. Every once in a while a pair of pants feels good. Is that "rebellion" as some would say?
 Does it really matter if I wear dresses or not? 
Does God really care about that?
Why do I know think like Sam? 
Why when I try to get quiet time do I get NOTHING out of it? 
I can not "schedule" my spirituality like he does. Most of the time when I try to sit down and have a "quiet - time" I am just reading the words. 
Why? Am I not a believer? 
Do I not have enough faith as he does? Or is it true what the Word says that men are to be the leaders, preachers of their homes, as well as the church. There has got to be a reason for that!! Was it just because God was being chovanistic(sp). I do not believe so- I think it is because we have a spiritual discernment that they(men) do not have. But they have a knowledge of the word, and law, that we do not have. We gain it from them.(right or wrong?)  
I do not know- all I know is I wonder why I am not hungering and thirsting for the Word. Why it does not eat at me- like it does him? What am I doing wrong?

Saturday, October 20, 2007

This week...

buzzed by with each day filled with the same routines. If I ever had to give an account of what I did every day honestly I would never remember.

Let's see- Monday-we schooled and stayed home because we had not soccer. Tuesday was schooling, and a soccer practice night, Wensday-I know what I did that day, schooling, and I had my biggest sports photo shoot yet. It was great. It was also my 15th year anniversary. Yes I said 15- can you believe it? I think about and think, has it really been 15 years. Wow- time flies. Other times I think 15 years that is it? Boy it sure does feel like longer. (haha) My beloved graces me with a beautiful dinner. What I enjoyed the most was his time! Being able to look in his face, hold his hand and converse with him without any interruptions from teenagers!
For those of you who have teenagers understand their need to talk, for those of you who do not, well time will show you! -moving on to trying to recall-Thursday was schooling, and a soccer night, but the sudden storm in Springfield cancelled all that-trust me dad and I were not complaining.(haha)
Friday-No schooling-we do not school fridays. Maria,Sammy,Joseph ,Noah and I decided to try out Christian County library. It is so much smaller then the one we normally go to, but it is not as busy. Sammy treated us to lunch,and we went to Lawerance's (photo store) for pricing and home again.
Not too bad for an "old lady" as my children say...

Saturday, October 13, 2007


I received this in an email and thought I would post it because it is just what I needed today. A reminder that, though I may feel alone My heavenly Father is always with me looking out for me.----
Do you know the legend of the Cherokee Indian youth's rite of passage? His father takes him into the forest, blindfolds him and leaves him alone. He is required to sit on a stump the whole night and not remove the blindfold until the rays of the morning sun shine through it. He cannot cry out for help to anyone. Once he survives the night, he is a MAN. He cannot tell the other boys of this experience, because each lad must come into manhood on his own. The boy is naturally terrified. He can hear all kinds of noises. Wild beasts must surely be all around him. Maybe even some human might do him harm. The wind blew the grass and earth, and shook his stump, but he sat stoically, never removing the blindfold. It would be the only way he could become a man! Finally, after a horrific night the sun appeared and he removed his blindfold. It was then that he discovered his father sitting on the stump next to him. He had been at watch the entire night, protecting his son from harm. We, too, are never alone. Even when we don't know it, our Heavenly Father is watching over us, sitting on the stump beside us. When trouble comes all we have to do is reach out to Him.

Friday, October 12, 2007

My weeks...

have been completely consumed by schooling, photo shoots, laundry, soccer, laundry, soccer, cleaning, laundry, soccer, and taking care of my sick baby, did I mention laundry and soccer?

Yes that is - that has been my life. We went to family camp at Maranatha Baptist Church- that was awesome. We had such a great time, and was so fed spiritually. We came home, and Joe Paul Sellers stuck around for the week. He has been such a blessing! Getting all the honey do things done that my beloved just does not have time for!! He is still here actually-spending time with his brother and helping him with work he needs to finish for Sellers & Sons.

As for myself- well- I have been feeling a bit lonely. It is so hard to say that, when people think, how can you be lonely when you have 6 children in the house. You can not talk to children about matters of the heart. My beloved has been consumed with providing and his brother, which leaves me on stand still. To think next week Sam and I will celebrate 15 years of marriage. Wow! It does not seem that long then at times it seems longer(haha)

That is life- nothing exciting to write about. Praise the Lord!


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