Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Will Over God’s Word

Many times in my marriage I have had the biggest battle going on inside of me over requests or tasks asked of me by my beloved husband.

Here is an example:  My dear beloved decided that it was best for us to go and spend Sunday afternoon  at his brother’s house. They were going to be watching the Super Bowl, like many American households,having friends and family over. My beloved decided thought this to be a good time for fellowship. Personally I did not want to go.  Let me give you a few reasons why: I had to prepare for my schooling week, I NEVER watch football,  and watching a football game is not “fellowship”, but regardless what I wanted he made the decision. I  felt forced to go-honestly. I, of course, suggested that he and the children can go and I can stay to accomplish my tasks. He negated that idea as soon as it escaped from my lips. NO we will go as a family, he said. With resentment building, I prepared myself for the evening.

As I prepared myself, I had this inner dialogue:

UGH-why do I have to go?

Am I not my own person?

Since when do I have to listen to him? 

Am I a child or an adult?

Does submission mean I lose my own will for my life or my desires?

In the quest to seek the answer to these questions  Will over God’s Word was born.

Will over God’s Word

By Angie Sellers


What is your Will?

Your will is :

the faculty of your mind by which you determine either to do or forbear an action, Choice; determination, or Disposition; inclination; desire.

Keeping in mind that our will is what we determine to happen, and how we choose things to go according to our desires. In other words when we set our  minds on something there is NOTHING anyone can do to stop us. Can I get an AMEN?

As much as  our will can be a positive thing in our lives, motivating us forward. It also can be a negative thing, motivating us to sin. Right? 

Before getting into the scripture lets define a few important words that we need to clearly understand in the text.

What is submission or what does it mean to be subject to someone?


Greek Word:hypotassō

1.The act of submitting; the act of yielding to power or authority

2.Acknowledgment of inferiority or dependence; humble or suppliant behavior

3.Obedience; compliance with the commands

4.Resignation; a yielding of one’s will to the will or appointment of a superior without murmuring

To Be Subject:

Greek word: hypotassō

1) to arrange under, to subordinate

2) to subject, put in subjection

3) to subject one's self, obey

4) to submit to one's control

5) to yield to one's admonition or advice

6) to obey, be subject

Now we know the meaning of the words, submit or subject. Before you start hyperventilating or allowing your temperature to rise lets continue and read Ephesians 5:22-23 carefully. Allow the Words of the Lord to sink in and ask the Holy Spirit to work on your heart to penetrate to the core of understanding.

Ephesians 5:22-23

22Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

23For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of the body.

Ephesians 5:22(Greek):

Αἱ γυναῖκες τοῖς ἰδίοις ἀνδράσιν ὑποτάσσεσθε, ὡς τῷ κυρίῳ

Ephesians 5:22(NASV)

22Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

23For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.


How many times have your read these verses?

How many times have your heard these verses preached?

For us(woman) these words are hard to understand and more so than that, they hard to swallow. You mean I actually have to listen to “him”, who ever your him is. Mine is a beloved “him”, but still a “him” none the less.

You are saying I have to listen to him without murmuring?


At what level or how much?

AS UNTO THE LORD or AS TO THE LORD.  The level of our subjection is the same level that we are to subject or submit to the Lord. We are to submit to our husbands as if we are submitting directly to the Lord.

Now I have a question: knowing the meaning of the word submission and what the Word of God says, would you fight with, murmur or rebuke the Lord as we do or have done to our husbands?

I will answer: Yes, Yes, and Yes-(I know I am stubborn!)

In answering Yes- is it right or Righteous?

No-it is not!

Lady- this is the hardest thing to swallow I know. Your will, your ways, must be subject to your head (your husband). You can not worry about whether he deserves it. (that is not in the scriptures) You can not worry about whether he does things right. (not there either) You must worry about your own heart, heeding the Word, and what your actions say unto the Lord.

What does the Lord see in you when He watches you?

Does He see one willing to walk in His ways and Truth? Or does He see one walking in her own ways and understanding?

Remember that the Lord’s thoughts and ways are NOT our own!

Look up: Isaiah 55:8-9

What is the first thought that came to your mind when you read those verses?


As wives and believers if we are to follow the Lord as Christ did, then we must submit as Christ did.

Look up :  John 5:30


In this verse Jesus’ words state he can do nothing  by his own power- The Lord, the Son of God, stated he could do nothing because He did not seek His own will, but the will of the Father who sent Him. Wow- if the Son of God did not seek his own will, why do we?

Look up: 1 Peter 2:21


Christ was the living example for us to follow. He submitted even unto death! Submitting ourselves to our husbands does not bring us to the point of death, does it?

Inside as your will battles with the very words of the Lord it may feel like death, but that is not true death really.

It is an example of the process of dying to ourselves?

That battle is our pride interfering with what is right and holy.

What is the process to deal with this?

How do we do what scripture asks of us as wives?

These are the series of questions that you should ask yourself when you find yourself  in this “War of the Will”:

Why is this task or request so hard for me?

Is what my husband asking of me unreasonable?

What outcome does he want to see from this task or request?

As you search your heart for the answer to these questions- the battle will subside your will and you will seek the will of your husband instead of your own will.

We are  to be the living  examples of Christ to those around us,whether it be children, co-workers, relatives, or even outsiders looking in.

Look up: 1 Timothy 4:12


People are watching you and how your interact with your husband. In the act of submission towards your husband you become an example of how others are to submit or obey the authority in their lives.


How do we say we love our husbands and not submit?

Look up:  Titus 2:4-5

According  to this verse if we do not submit  we are blaspheming the Word of God.This hurt me deeply to think that as I did not submit I was blaspheming the Word of God.

What does Blaspheme mean?


To speak of, or address, with impious irreverence; to revile impiously (anything sacred)

Dear Lady if your heart and will is to serve the Lord, are we not to serve Him in ALL THINGS?


Look up:  Duet. 31: 6-8


Even when it seems too difficult The Lord promises to never leave you.



Look up: 1 Corth. 10:13


He will never give you anything you can not handle.

Look up: Psalm 5:11


Now that we have faced what submission is, and why we should submit. Lets look at this at a different angle. Being married for 16 years, I have had to ask myself, does my husband really mean me harm?

How many of you can honestly say that your husband’s purpose is to harm you or the family?


Look up: Ephesians 5:25-28


Most husband’s love their wives so deeply. They love her as much as they do their own bodies, if not more. Knowing your husband loves your so deeply, then why is submitting so hard?

Did you know that this is how you show your righteous Godly love to your husband?

Dear Lady submission is not a step towards being a mouse or a doormat. It is a step towards being a righteous woman.  Take one step at a time, one situation as they come from your husband remembering that he loves you.

Look up: Proverb 31:28


Submit your ways, your will and pride each day unto your husband, and to the Lord, it will bring you blessings from your husband and praise.

Let this be your prayer, dear Lady. Also find an older sister that emulates these traits in her life and when you struggle ask her to pray for you. Most of all pray for strength from the Holy Spirit and guidance from the Word of God!


Thank you for allowing me to walk you through the Word. May the Lord use it to His Glory!



  1. Submission to my husband is something the Lord is still training me on. I'm better than I used to be, but not yet where I need to be. I've seen the Lord work miracles in my marriage by submitting to my husband's plan even when I felt it was wrong, wrong, wrong. I followed his plan anyway (not into sin, like your husband asking you to go watch the game). Through the act of obedience changes came about in our relationship. Blessings started to abound. The Lord has been working in me in that area this past week. A Bible study I'm taking right now mentioned our husband's are like sand paper to us, softening and molding us in God's image. I felt like He pulled out the power tools to sand me me down. OUCH! But worth it. It's always worth it when we submit first to the Lord and to our husband.

    Love & blessings-

  2. This was really good. Can I copy this and share it with my Moms group at church?
    God bless,


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