Sunday, May 20, 2012

A friend loves no matter what....

Lately I have felt like I have no "real" friends (except of course my Beloved and my children) around me... Don't get me wrong I have friends( Celina,Lanie) who are just a phone call away but I am talking about a friend that is with me through thick and thin. Through my straight forward ,honest not intending to offend ways, and will love me and truly knows my heart. Who will walk with me through every day life and who loves me at all times and loves me like a sister.

A friend loves at all times,and a brother is born for adversity. (Proverbs 17:17 ESV)

This scripture seeps to my bones, to my very soul. With realizing their is someone in my life that has decided they no longer want to speak to me, without an explanation, without giving me an opportunity to correct my offense or to even give a chance to ask for forgiveness has made me realize two things.

1. Their are those who say they love you but truly do not.

2. I must always remember to be forgiving!

Why the second because this scriptures ring in my ears

If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you withhold forgiveness from any, it is withheld." (John 20:23 ESV)

bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. (Colossians 3:13 ESV)

"Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven; (Luke 6:37 ESV)

I never want the Lord to withhold forgiveness from me because I am unwilling to forgive someone.

To me the scriptures are life and breath and give me guidance when I don't know where to turn.


So to those whom I have offended please forgive me.


May you find grace and love to love me.



Saturday, May 19, 2012

When did I become the older woman?

There was a time when I sat in a room with a group of women that I was one of the younger ones if not the youngest in the room but just recently I have noticed a transition occurring. A transition that I am unsure whether I am happy about or not. I have now transitioned to being one of the oldest women within the room. When did that happen?


It seems like yesterday all my children were little and I was seeking advice and counsel from those older women on how to rear them Godly. Now I am the one with the older children, now I hear myself passing on experience and trying to give encouragement and wisdom.... Oh my when did I become the older woman??!!! Where did the time go?? In a blink my Paul went from being 5 to 21 years old.

It is not a lie or an understatement or even a joke when they say "time goes in a blink of an eye"....




Friday, May 18, 2012

Stuck between two worlds

about 10 years ago we started the journey of homeschooling. In the journey we have come to realize that Homeschooling was not just a way to school our children but a way to live. I know there are some who wonder why we decided to go this route for our lives, for our children lives to school our children at home? Why do that with perfectly good public schools?
I realized when my 21 year old was younger ( not young enough) I was fighting something. Something I could not see, we faithfully took our children to church and in this season they were in children's church, we were involved in adult group, and served. Yes we were the traditional Christian family till one day the Lord showed me there was more to my walk than what I was walking. It was more than going through the motions each day. In my children I saw the struggle of knowing what was right and trying to put that into action and still be "liked" within the public school. It reminds me of
"For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate." (Romans 7:15 ESV)
Each day it became a battle to keep the hearts of my children and to help them to live for the Lord. Then one day I realized that the very thing I was fighting is the very thing we all fight each day... satan. And I was expecting my innocent, ill equipped children to fight as warriors against the enemy in his own domain on his terms. It was setup for failure so homeschooling allowed me to equip my children, surrounding them, protecting and equipping them with the only thing I know will defeat the enemy, the Word of God.
Now that they are older I still see them struggling some do better standing on the Rock of the Word and others seem to be struggling and stuck between two worlds... As a believer we can't be stuck between two worlds. We must decide which world we prefer or the decision will be made for us because one world will stand out in us over the other world.

My heart grieves because I feel defeat, I see the affects of the world within my children and wonder in the end where they will end up in their hearts for Christ. Will all we have done to raise them up in Him be for nothing?

Lord give me strength to continue to guide each of these souls no matter age and bring YOU glory.


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