Monday, August 8, 2016

Planning date night - to do or not to do...

Lately I have been reading this book on wives... and God's purpose for us. I don't really want to share the title because I don't want to seem like I am bashing her or her book. I am not through it all yet. I am on chapter 4.

I have gleened some things from it. Like there is a statement she makes where she says marriages do not fail,people fail the marriage. Marriage was established by God so it can not fail for He is perfect! If you think about what she is saying It so true - people fail the covenant not God who established the covenant.

As she tries to give sound advice to wives and of course some of it is good stuff she starts to become a bit brutal in her advice. She makes such dogmatic statements that make me think wow lady isn't that a bit harsh to say. Example she was sharing about her husband liking to plan their once a week date nights. And that any woman who plans the date night is stupid for not allowing him to do it. Let me quote her words exactly: " I am not saying that a wife is rebellious for planning her evenings with her husband. I am saying she is pretty stupid. I want the pleasure of him planning things for me." (Ouch)

Well all I can say is so do I and I have been married for 24 years and in those 24 years my beloved has planned a handful of "date nights". He is a very focused man who provides well for his family and forgets that time alone is very important. He has never had the leisure to sit at a desk which would allow time to think research or even plan nights for the two of us. His job has demanded a lot from him physically so in return I take the time to show him how much it means to me by planning a night for him and I. To make such a dogmatic statement to young impressionable wives leaves them discouraged thinking that being a helpmeet such as I try to be to my beloved is wrong and now I am stupid. Honestly I don't see it as stupid. I see it as smart to help my husband In ways and areas he is either weak in or just unable to. ( again a definition of a helpmeet? What is it?)

Older women should be careful in how dogmatic we are in our statements unless it is in the scriptures. No where in scripture does it say that women should not plan date nights for their husband or that women should not help their husband.

There is more but I will leave that for another post!


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