These past two weeks I have been seeking Him. Wondering where He was in my heart. Wondering why I "feel" so distant from him. And I have come to realize that I have withdrawn my heart, my love from Him. He has not gone any where. He is here, walking beside me waiting for me to see, what I had done.
Confession time: I had withdrawn my heart from Him because he had not blessed me with another child. I go from being angry, to not understanding why this one prayer, which is in His Character.. (because He only answers prayers that are in His Character- example if you pray make me rich (monetarily)Lord- he most likely will not do that because things of this world are not important to Him) He has not answered. Does He even hear me?
There I have said it. I am a brat.. a spoiled selfish, brat! In need of His forgiveness, and in need of His love!
How many of you have withdrawn your love?
It could be from a loved one, not just the Lord. Those we are closes to tend to hurt us the most, and in reaction, in protecting ourselves, we withdraw our love from them.
I know my mom did that to me because of the pain I caused her in my teen years, she withdrew her love from me. She took care of me, but because she did not like me, and treated me like she did not love me. I could tell she withdrew her heart from me. Have I ever gained that back? I am not sure!( I will let you know)
We all think we have a reasons for doing this, but where would we be, what would we do if God the Father did that to us??
Thank you for allowing me to share with you what Christ is doing within me!
Pondering
Angie
Confession time: I had withdrawn my heart from Him because he had not blessed me with another child. I go from being angry, to not understanding why this one prayer, which is in His Character.. (because He only answers prayers that are in His Character- example if you pray make me rich (monetarily)Lord- he most likely will not do that because things of this world are not important to Him) He has not answered. Does He even hear me?
There I have said it. I am a brat.. a spoiled selfish, brat! In need of His forgiveness, and in need of His love!
How many of you have withdrawn your love?
It could be from a loved one, not just the Lord. Those we are closes to tend to hurt us the most, and in reaction, in protecting ourselves, we withdraw our love from them.
I know my mom did that to me because of the pain I caused her in my teen years, she withdrew her love from me. She took care of me, but because she did not like me, and treated me like she did not love me. I could tell she withdrew her heart from me. Have I ever gained that back? I am not sure!( I will let you know)
We all think we have a reasons for doing this, but where would we be, what would we do if God the Father did that to us??
Thank you for allowing me to share with you what Christ is doing within me!
Pondering
Angie
I too have at times walked away from my First Love as well and yet He's been there waiting for me sometimes giving me little nudges, but most times just waiting. I'm ever so thankful for your transparency and honesty. God will bless you. How? Only He knows, but it doesn't mean I have to stop praying for you to be blessed with more children.
ReplyDeleteI love ya!!!
I really enjoyed this....
ReplyDeleteCelina
I am so thankful that even when we withdraw or are cold towards our Heavenly Father, He is always wanting us to be closer to Him and is waiting and ready with outstretched arms for us to come home. Being a prodigal is not always just in a physical sense, it can also be an issue of the heart.
ReplyDeleteBeing blessed or not blessed with another child are such heavy desires in a woman's heart. (((hugs))) I am praying for you and hope you will continue to pray for me. I am so thankful we are friends! Now we just have to get together for coffee, even if it's iced! :)